Most of us crave connection. Not the superficial kind, but the kind that sees us — the raw, unfiltered version. But here’s the paradox: to feel accepted, we often show only the parts of ourselves that feel safe to others. The version they can relate to. The one that won’t make them uncomfortable. The one that performs.
It works… for a while.
Until something in the soul whispers — this isn’t it. This isn’t who we are. It’s just who we’ve learned to be. We keep performing until something breaks — a relationship, our health, or the quiet thread that ties us to ourselves.
The truth is, it’s a tough cycle to break. Because people like what they know. And when you start to unmask, they may pull away — not because you’re wrong, but because they’re not ready. It takes an emotional alchemist to stay the course: to shed the performative layers, to risk being misunderstood, and to choose authenticity over approval.
It’s isolating at times. But also deeply liberating.
The real connection begins when we connect to ourselves — and no longer negotiate the parts of us we know are sacred. That doesn’t make us better. Just aware. And awareness, I believe, is the only way through.
I still fall short. I still catch myself reacting from ego or emotion. But I try. Every day. And that’s all I can do — try to be as real as I can, and trust that the ones meant for me will stay. Not because I filtered myself to fit, but because they see me and chose to stay anyway.
That’s the kind of connection worth waiting for, I feel.
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